Wraith
Overview The Wraith, Wrape, or Big Purple Grape Thing That Kills, is a Big ol' dammit tank that the Retards who want us all dead made. In Halo Combat Evolved the Wrape had no secondary weapon, and therefore sucksed becaus it wasn't usable either. In Halo 2 it had TWO secondary turrets, that you cou;dn't use, therefore it sucked. In Halo 3 it had a secondary turret your friend/bitch could use, therefore it was ****ING AWESOME! Same with Reacharound. In halo wars, well, lets just say halo wars sucked. But it was created to try and stop Master Beef, and failed miserably. But it rocks when fighting humanity's best retards. Interior The Wraith has a really shitty interior. The seat is uncomfortable, it's dark, it's very hot, and there's no room. To top it all off, grunts like to steal the cigarette lighters out of them and leave garbage on the floor. After spending about half an hour, the driver dosn't even mind geting killed. Strengths While riding the Wraith, the halopedia whore/knave guy found that the Wraith was godly. It's only weakness was... one of the stupidest you could imagine: that's right, a fully armed banshee could barely take one down but somehow Master Chief can simply jump aboard and smash the shining f*** out of the poor Brute/Elite that was driving the tank. If the rider of the tank does manage to get a lucky shot at you, you're pretty much like Chris Browns' career: TOTALLY FUCKED. Most of the games' AI are godly at aiming the Wraith's steroid-powered cannon. Once, one of these guys was on top of a bridge preparing to snipe off a random grunt's head, when all-of-a-sudden some huge wWraith comes out from a rock that was so far away that the screens resolution couldn't even show it. You know what that tank did then little Jackal? It shot a round at the Noob and the Noob laughed, for it was soo far away that the shot seemed to be way off. Within a few sconds though, that Noob was standing in heaven wondering, why the fuck did I just stand there? zomg '' '' Along with it's powerful cannon, the Wraith possesses the ability to charge forward and plow through any idiotic knave stupid enough to stand a few feet from the front o the tank. This charge was mainly built in to keep Jesus Christ in the form of a badass video game character from hopping on top and beating the driver intto a pile of oatmeal. It was mostly phail against god but it did work against the noobs who tried to be like god. Weaknesses Noob know how to get in it, nuff said. Compared to Scorpion *Main gun - more spread but weaker and much harder to hit anything with *Secondary weapon - Halo 1: non-existant, Halo 2: only AI can use it, Halo 3 and Reach around: seperate turret and sucky *Defence - Halo 2: Same armour but boost makes it harder to baord, Halo 3 and Reach around: same plus Big spinny weakness in back, Scopion lacks this You can beat the shit out of a hatch at the back of a Scorpion, your doing it wrong. *Speed - Halo 1: This version was even jealous of the Elephant. Halo 2 and 3: It is faster, but still slowazz, so Bungie gave you a boost that lasts for .5 seconds and is usable again 3 seconds later. Halo Reach around: Much faster, with longer lasting nitro but wow this thing is slippery as hell, when you drive it you feel like you drive as terrible as Catherine-B320. Trivia *The Wraith seems to change it's skin every time bungie craps out another halo game, this can be seen by playing the halo games. *A common trick that can be seen on the Halo version of Jackass, is the Wraith jump. In all honesty, this is dumber than stuffing a grenade down your pants and setting it to blow your penis off. To do this trick: 1: convince a person to stand against a wall, 2: charge the guy with a Wraith so fast that all the person against the wall can do is jump, 3: watch the dimwit fly really high or watch the Wraith ram him against the wall. *By combining a Wraith shot with Gruntiness, you can create an Anti-Air Wraith (you also need to pay an extra $50 dollars, lose your virginity and beat Cortana (Level) on Mythic without dying). Category:Vehicles Category:Elites Category:Things that kick ass Category:Covenant Category:Shit people complain about Category:Saving the universe. Category:Epic Shit Category:Proof that grunts are epic. Category:Purple Category:Madness